Should people grow up in their loneliness?


Loneliness should be common feeling shared among people, no matter where they are in this world or the stage of life they are stuck at. People cannot avoid such feeling at least once during their whole lives and sometimes, I wonder if struggling with the loneliness crowding deep inside their minds could be an effective treatment for your fragmented thoughts and provide with inspiration for your next move?

Feeling lonely should never be associated with the idea of being alone. You may be surrounded by couples of friends but fail to share with them what are clinging to your mind, which should be considered a symptom of being lonely.

I am not a great thinker to summon all the forms that loneliness exists in this world or not old enough to have a nearly comprehensive understanding of the loneliness invading other people’s lives. I can just share about the loneliness of mine in this post, which appears once or twice during couples of months, exerting profound impacts on my mind, though.

I am used to feeling lonely when facing with failure, with the uncertainty and sometimes, with the success. If the uncertainty often comes after the failure or the success, I do think it should be the main cause of such lonely feeling or “what comes up next” phenomenon.

I used to actively post something on my Facebook when everything ran smoothly in my life and retreated back to my own shell when things did not come in my way and as observed from my friends on Facebook, I do realize the same thing happens to them. We often talk a lot when we are enjoying success or enjoying an easy time in our life but keep quiet when we face up with failure or uneasy time in our lives. We sometimes refuse to go to a social event or hangout with friends as we are afraid that people will ask us about what’s going on and we are afraid our answers will disappoint them. And this feeling is hardly shared with the others, which results in the deeper loneliness.

Loneliness, as considered being miserable or negative, does have some positive impacts in one’s life, or at least mine. As written in a famous Vietnamese song, “people only grow up in their loneliness”, we certainly get something from the lonely period of our lives. To me, it is the time to reminisce about the past, pick up the fragmented lessons and think of next steps to take in my life. Loneliness caused by the lack of understanding from our surrounding people urges me not to rely on my old sources of inspiration but step out and find other sources, i.e. find somebody who may share the same stage of mind with you or read a new book. Loneliness urges me to change, to be better day by day.

Feeling lonely is not necessarily bad. I think in our life, we need some moments of feeling lonely to fill the gaps between different periods of life. Time of loneliness is like the time to have our minds take a rest after life turbulence or to recharge our minds with meaningful thoughts. Just treasure the loneliness when it comes but remember not to have it crowd in on our minds for so long but to spare some spaces of our minds for the sunshine…

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